40 lessons for 40 years

I celebrated my 40th birthday over the weekend. This was a big one for me. I had been ‘practicing’ telling people I’m forty for about three years leading up to this birthday to help me feel more prepared for it. Now that I’m on the other side, I thought to write down some of the lessons I’ve learned over the past 40 years — many of which I really feel I’ve only truly ‘absorbed’ in the last couple of years–one or two as recently as last week, and there are a few I’m still working on. Ha! So here goes nothin’ : 40 lessons for 40 years: 

1. I am my own best friend
2. I am my toughest critic
3. Smart means different things to different people
4. Sexy means different things to different people
5. Owning up to mistakes is hot
6. Physical beauty is defined by inner beauty
7. Charisma is contagious
8. Negativity is also contagious
9. Passion acts like a fertilizer to any creative project
10. Taking things too personally only hurts myself
11. Creativity and confidence are intimately connected
12. Being “non-confrontational” doesn’t usually make situations better or more comfortable in the long run
13. Wrinkles, grey hair, body hair in general and stretch marks are beautiful
14. Loving myself *hard* makes it easier for me to love others *hard*
15. The way others get things done isn’t neccessarily the best way for me to get things done
16. Herb(s) are magical
17. It’s ok for people not to like me
18. It’s ok for people not to agree with me
19. Dancing is therapeutic
20. Laughing is therapeutic
21. Making music is therapeutic
22. Painting is therapeutic
23. Plants are therapeutic
24. “Why” is a really important question (the most important??)
25. Good processes beget good outcomes
26. A lot can be done with a little, and makes space for creativity
27. Holding on to anger is not healthy
28. Diversity breeds better outcomes
29. Practice anything daily and I’ll get good at it
30. It’s ok to disappoint people
31. Things that I once thought of as personal weaknesses or defects have become some of my greatest strengths
32. Listening is almost always more effective than talking
33. A heartfelt apology can go a long way
34. WHO you surround yourself with is one of the most important life decisions
35. Routines are important. Breaking routines is also important
36. Everyone is struggling with something, some people are just better at hiding it than others
37. A little kindness goes a long way
38. It is easy to spread joy
39. My gut is rarely wrong (but it is wrong sometimes)
40. I feel my best when I feel the most connected to Mother Earth

//photo by Dabito

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